A Lesson to Us All

I love women with a great sense of humour who can take care of every situation without feeling embarrassed and come out looking as charming as ever.

A case in point is the admirable Lorraine Kelly, who kept her cool when Robert Downey Jr. (my favourite actor) arrived for an interview and promptly commented that she had ‘nice tits’.

Instead of being outraged, as some prickly women would have been, she remained unabashed. Robert was looking in a shambolic state, being shoeless and rather dazed.

Kelly’s behaviour in the circumstances was immaculate. At the age of fifty-four she must have realised that, after all, the actor meant it as a compliment. Otherwise he would not have ventured with the observation.

‘It could have been worse,’ she told Jonathan Ross magnanimously, during an appearance on his show. ‘He could have said, “Oh, I don’t like them.” It would have been a difficult thing to respond to.’

Well, Lorraine has the right attitude. For although Robert’s remark is traditionally considered unacceptable, particularly by the feminist commentariat, it can only be interpreted by the enlightened majority as a sign of admiration for that part of a woman’s body which men throughout the ages have been lyrically obsessed with.

Why make a fuss, therefore, of the phraseology of a man whose drug addiction and vulnerability got him into many a scrap, when his throwaway observation was simply, I imagine, to break the ice, given his tattered appearance at the time.

Lorraine proved that strong women are more immune to men’s lewd behaviour than feminists lead us to believe. Her handling of the whole awkward encounter must in the circumstances be a lesson to us all.