Reforming La Dolce Vita

Has Berlusconi’s lust for sex cooled off as a result of his community service, following a fraud conviction, which had seen him entertaining Alzheimer patients at a care home near Milan for the last ten months, with the former cruise-ship crooner going as far as to regale them with love songs?

It seems most unlikely that his sex addiction has suddenly given way to contrition despite his statement that ‘the time spent with the sick, with the volunteers, with the health and social workers, has been a moving experience’, adding that he now ‘plans to continue with the experience’.

That might be the case, for men of his prodigious talents for self-promotion can often reveal a hidden aspect of their persona normally kept under wraps for fear of wrecking their Lothario image which has served them well in their particular sphere of operations.

However, embarrassing wiretaps made public for the first time reveal that Silvio Berlusconi, the former Italian prime minister, complained that he ‘flagged’ in Cabinet meetings after partying ‘too hard’ into the earlier hours of the morning. He also asked an alleged pimp to limit the number of women at parties to ‘two a head’.

For us normal heterosexuals that in itself requires a vigorous disposition, nevertheless. But for Berlusconi that was perhaps considered a more reasonable watering down of his carnal activities to control the dissipation of his total energies, some of which were needed elsewhere.

The taped conversations were released during the trial of Gianpaolo Tarantini, who is accused of supplying prostitutes to Berlusconi at his Rome mansion in 2008 and 2009.

The court was told that Mr Tarantini, an entrepreneur who has previously been convicted of dealing cocaine, spoke regularly with Berlusconi while he was prime minister to organise supplying prostitutes for his parties. He also listened as Berlusconi regaled him with stories of his political exploits including a boast that he had convinced the United States and Europe to bail out the banks during the financial crisis of 2008.

In the tapes, Berlusconi said to Mr Taratini: ‘I thought I would die of tiredness. I cannot do three o’clock in the morning any more.’ Berlusconi said he would be inviting to one party ‘very powerful senior Italian television executives who could find work for his female guests’.

Where now for Berlusconi? With two girls a night as his limit, he might find time to stir the political pot once again and bring a much needed jollity to the European scene, which has of late no one else to entertain them – except the goofy François Hollande who fumbles around causing mayhem as he goes along.

Berlusconi will make the ideal glittering distraction that only a rogue of his calibre can generate. A reformed Berlusconi, however, will be an utter boring fart which we could dispense with.

Oh God, please save us from such a misfortune.

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