Nothing like a Dame

Miley Cyrus has a formidable rival in Dame Helen Mirren in her new impromptu role as the twerking queen.

At a ceremony in Harvard University the British actress (sixty-eight), who joked to her audience that she practised twerking in private, was then encouraged to give it a go as she was named Hasty Pudding Theatricals Woman of the Year.

The notorious dance that jaculated Miley to a starry new career was the highlight of the evening. Dame Helen was as usual in her element and got a rousing reception. As for Miley, renowned for sticking out her tongue and bottom, she is now in the throes of a most unexpected transformation. Instead of removing her clothes, she’s now putting them on.

In the new issue of LOVE magazine, she appears baring nothing racier than a shoulder. In one shot she is clad in a Vivienne Westwood T-shirt; in another, a pale pink mink coat by Miu Miu.

In every picture she is almost make-up free, her pale face in homage to the natural look that is in contrast to her usual made-up style. In the interview that follows Miley, who has 16.9 million followers on Twitter, addresses the infamous twerking incident that sparked uproar after she danced on stage with the Blurred Lines singer Robin Thicke, dressed in a rubber bra and knickers. She says: ‘Really when people think of “twerking” the first thing they think is me, and I’m just a little white girl from Nashville who put up a funny video of me in a onesie, dancing. Then people take it crazy. What’s crazy to me, and this is nuts, is that sexually it’s still so offensive. Kids need to know about sexuality. Girls need to be comfortable in that,’ she says.

Katie Grand, LOVE’s editor-in-chief, who styled Mylie for the magazine, said: ‘She was not so unapologetic about her sexuality and her nudity, nor was she self-deprecating about her body in the way a lot of girls are…Miley is not like that. She is confident.’

Can you for a minute envisage Helen Mirren, the grand lady of the theatre and cinema, joining Miley in a dancing routine – both half-dressed, leaving little to the imagination, in a rumbustious twerking number where each will try to outdo the other, frolicking in a gusto of sexual energy? I can well visualise such a partnership to light up the stage and cause a volcanic eruption of merriment the likes of which an audience will seldom see.

If I were an impresario with a flair for the unusual and decadent I would hasten to sign the pair of them, for such an explosive display of pure theatrical magic, where youth and an accomplished icon of a certain age, vie for public adoration. My money, however, would be on Helen Mirren who will no doubt come out on top. May the good Lord keep her in trim.

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One response to “Nothing like a Dame

  1. Trim but not slim as I don’t think it would suite her voluptuous looks..